Gisa and Julian

You know Gisa, I've been thinking more on your 9/2/10 post. What you and the whole family are going through is truly amazing with the significance of it all. And still, there are several perspectives one might assume.

Were my name Gisa Rollin, it's guaranteed I'd feel overwhelmed and somehow inadequate to meet all these challenges … at first. Then, I'd gather myself (somehow, and you have resources,)

Your husband's got *major* health issues, and is to receive a new liver. This isn't a small thing - without his liver, he cannot survive. Hence, his own Mother, Rosa, endures absent that liver transplant and will likely die. She amazingly is well at peace with this situation, yet I think she at times seems to waiver.

Your own Mother's suffering with [ovarian?] cancer. Amazingly, you're there - attending to her every whim and desire. Gisa, this is absolutely wonderful! Wonderful, and oh, so hard. And your Mom's a bit of a pistol; she's a real fighter, and her battles lie ahead of her.

Kenji and Keo each make demands of their Mom that are altogether stringent and yet very, very dear. I love the way you reflect on needing to tell them both that you'll be there for them - no matter what (and no matter your own state of mind.) In fact, the sadness of the entire piece suggests a retreat into the space of a little girl, say of Kenji's age? We all do this you know, when tired or otherwise overwhelmed. We probably even do it when very happy!

At any rate, be good to yourself. No one in your world is able to do this right now. You are all alone … but for that still small voice inside that says, "Peace. And all shall be well, and all manner of thing shall be well." See the Optimism of Julian of Norwich: A Contemplative Essay on the 'Showing of Love." http://www.umilta.net/barsotti.html